Self Esteem part 4

How many cares one loses when one decides not to be something but to be someone. - Coco Chanel

 

I think of life itself now as a wonderful play that I've written for myself, and so my purpose is to have the utmost fun playing my part. - Shirley MacLaine

 

Learn to be what you are, and learn to resign with a good grace all that you are not. - Henri Frederic Amiel

 

The most exhausting thing in life is being insincere. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

 

Outstanding leaders go out of their way to boost the self-esteem of their personnel. If people believe in themselves, it's amazing what they can accomplish. - Sam Walton

 

You must have control of the authorship of your own destiny. The pen that writes your life story must be held in your own hand. - Irene C. Kassorla

 

A man who doesn't trust himself can never really trust anyone else. - Cardinal De Retz

 

He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away. - Raymond Hull

 

Put all excuses aside and remember this: YOU are capable. - Zig Ziglar

 

It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for something you are not. - Andre Gide

 

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be. - Kurt Vonnegut

 

One's real life is often the life that one does not lead. - Oscar Wilde

 

Unless I accept my faults I will most certainly doubt my virtues. - Hugh Prather

 

The authentic self is the soul made visible. - Sarah Ban Breathnach

 

Self-respect is the cornerstone of all virtue. - John Herschel

 

Respect for ourselves guides our morals, respect for others guides our manners. - Laurence Sterne

 

Respect yourself if you would have others respect you. - Baltasar Gracian

 

Self-pity is our worst enemy and if we yield to it, we can never do anything wise in the world. - Helen Keller

 

Self-pity gets you nowhere. One must have the adventurous daring to accept oneself as a bundle of possibilities and undertake the most interesting game in the world making the most of one's best. - Harry Emerson Fosdick

 

Self-respect is the fruit of discipline: the sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself. - Abraham Heschel

 

Self-respect permeates every aspect of your life. - Joe Clark

 

Someone's opinion of you does not have to become your reality. - Les Brown

 

Sooner or later, those who win are those who think they can. - Richard Bach

 

Do not wish to be anything but what you are, and try to be that perfectly. - St. Francis De Sales

 

It is better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for something you are not. - Andre Gide

 

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

The most important opinion you have is the one you have of yourself, and the most significant things you say all day are those things you say to yourself. - Anonymous

 

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. - Eleanor Roosevelt

 

I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence but it comes from within. It is there all the time. - Anna Freud

 

Don't live down to expectations. Go out there and do something remarkable. - Wendy Wasserstein

 

Whether you think you can or think you can't - you are right. - Henry Ford

 

I quit being afraid when my first venture failed and the sky didn't fall down. - Allen H. Neuharth

 

Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

If you really put a small value upon yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise your price. - Anonymous

 

Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong. - Peter T. McIntyre

 

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage. - Anaïs Nin

 

You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them. - Michael Jordan

 

It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves. - Sir Edmund Hillary

 

Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside of them was superior to circumstance. - Bruce Barton
 

A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their graves obscure men whose timidity prevented them from making a first effort. - Sydney Smith


These were some of the self-esteem quotes, which I find very inspiring. They do indeed teach you a lot about life in general. I am sure there are many more quotes as well. Along with the quotes staying positive and having faith in one’s ability will also prove to be beneficial.


Negative thoughts just pull you down and make the situation worst for you. So it is always better to think positive and be optimistic. It may not make everything turn out best for you but it will definitely make you feel happy and satisfied. It gives you strength to cope with your problems increasing the level of your confidence.

Many psychologists say that positive thinking has the power to attract good things to us. In fact, what you think is what happens to you. So always wish for good and nice things and they will surely come to you. Affirmations are similar to wishful thinking, they help you believe in yourself and what you stand for. Read further to know more about daily affirmations for self-esteem, as it helps you develop a positive side of your personality.


What are Daily Affirmations?


Daily affirmations are nothing but positive statements that you can say to yourself every day. They can have a great impact on your thought process and help you achieve what you want. They can bring profound transformations in your personal life by overcoming the negative thoughts. They also provide you with lots of motivation and inspiration you would require to reach your destination and achieve all the goals and aims in life.

Daily affirmations can be in the form of statements, keywords or some mantras and symbols that hold special meaning for you. These daily affirmations promote positive thinking and help you build self-esteem.

 There can be a variety of self-affirmations related to different aspects of life, such as success, health, relationships, self-esteem, etc. You can make your daily affirmations on your own using positive statements. But two things you should keep in mind while making your self-affirmations. First, always write affirmations in a positive tone, for example, "I am happy" instead of "I am not sad". Secondly, write affirmations in the present tense, for example, "I am happy" instead of "I will be happy".

Wisely written affirmations work instantaneously for your self-improvement and personal development. This article will provide you with a list of positive daily affirmations for self-esteem, which will bring drastic positive changes in your life.

 

List of Positive Daily Affirmations

 

I have the power to change myself.

I am happy that I got the opportunity to do what I like.

I am using the best of my abilities to improve my life.

I like my job and give my hundred precent to it.

I am confident and organized.

I am open minded and use criticism for self-improvement.

I am happy in every situation, even in stressful moments.

I deserve to be successful.

I deserve to be happy.

I deserve to be loved.

I learn from my mistakes.

I am happy to take challenges and risks in life.

I have the knowledge and skills to make my work the best.

I have the decision power and I make right choices.

I think for myself and have my own choice in all aspects of life.

I believe in goodness of life.

I can forgive myself and others too.

I can understand other people and their motives.

I feel proud of myself and my loved ones.

 

The above daily positive affirmations will help you increase your self-esteem and happiness. Write down the affirmations on a piece of paper and read them in mind or aloud every day. Repeat the affirmations at regular intervals during the day.

You can also stick the affirmations where it can be easily visible, such as dressing table, study table, soft board of your cubicle, etc. It will keep you surrounded by the positive thought all the time. For improving self-esteem, whenever you feel low or the negative thoughts are about strike you, read the affirmations aloud and keep the pessimism away from you.
 

Daily affirmations for self-esteem program your subconscious in a way that it removes all the negative ideas from there, making you a natural positive thinker. According to law of attraction, affirmations create positive vibes around you and attract only what you want in life. All you have to do is believe in what you want and repeat it with conviction, attention, interest, and desire and I am sure you will create your own world the way you want it.

 

'I feel low.....'

'Why do I hesitate to speak what I feel like.....'

'I think, I am not that pretty.....'

 

.....and there goes a list of woes of a person who is unhappy with who he is, what he is and with the conditions that make him the most miserable person under the sun. One word gives a gist for the above lines and that is a low self-esteem.

The traits exhibited by a person, solely depends on the levels of his self-esteem, which is an important aspect of a growing personality. Or should I say, it is one unparalleled quality which could make or break a person. In short, it is a feeling that makes you comprehend the dignity and importance of you being you.

A low self-esteem is worse than an instant death as it makes you feel wretched and gross, further blinding you against the greener pastures of life, which could have been visible only if the self-esteem level was high. So let's discuss some self-esteem activities which would help you evaluate yourself! So ready for a self-esteem test? But here, you go with some self-esteem building activities first!

 
Self Esteem Activities

Self-esteem is a feeling that comes with confidence, and more with love for self. Or let me put it this way, self-esteem adds 'life' to your otherwise mundane life! Here, let me share some interesting building self-esteem activities, which did make a big difference for me! Trust me, after implementing the below tips on how to improve self-esteem, you will rediscover yourself. Be assured that the new 'you' will be more confident, more stable and more focused in life! But before, you proceed for a self-esteem test, read the activities below! May be the results of the self-esteem test taken, will bring a smile on your face!

 

Learn to laugh at yourself.....

The first step to overcome low self-esteem is learning to laugh at oneself. By this statement, I do not mean laughing literally, but in the sense that, learn to accept a situation in life with a smile, by first calculating the positive outcome of the given state of affairs. Here, let me share a hypothetical example: You are walking down a lane, and a banana peel on road successfully eludes your sight and you unsuccessfully slip over and fall flat on your face.. I know, it is a very embarrassing situation. But can something that is by gone be undone? No! So now, what are your possible reactions to this situation?

1.You sit there with your face down, wait for someone to come and help you.

2.You get up, look around to see if anyone caught you in that awkward pose, and walk away with a frightened expression with your eyes almost popping out.

3.You just get up, dust yourself, throw the peel into the dustbin, smile at yourself and walk off!

Now, the first point says, your self-esteem is low and it is so low that you are unable to grab the situation by neck and face it!

The second reaction indicates, there is a fear in you, fear of having been caught in such a sticky condition, where the crowd that may (or may not) have watched you, may (or may not) have giggled and there may have been people whom you knew and who might have aired your anecdote to the world! (I must say, being apprehensive is normal, but an apprehension anticipating things which possibly may not even happen is absolutely dopey!)

The third reaction is one, which exhibits the trait of a person with a good self-esteem! Now let me explain! The person (which here, is you) in the third case, has possibly understood, that nothing could avert what happened. He has also understood the fact that the situation can be avoided in future, if it has a chance of recurring. 

The smile here is what I call as laughing at one's own mistakes. Why I call this as a boosting up of self-esteem, is because such accidents in life speak volumes of philosophy. It implies, "Nothing abnormal has occurred. Today, it was you, tomorrow it could be someone else! Throw the incident into your baggage of the past, unmount it not without imbibing the lessons learnt and move on!".

 
Activity

To make this an activity, make a group with your peers, friends and kin, and help everyone narrate the funny, embarrassing, sad, happy, traumatic incidents of their lives. The first person always feels the heat of the situation, but gradually when the crowd joins him, he will be able to overcome his inferiority complex symptoms and will understand that he is not the only one, after all! As  the best thing is, you along with the crowd will laugh, cry, empathize and then feel the importance of the smile that follows that no situation in life is too embarrassing to trouble your self-esteem all lifelong!

 

Engage yourself in a world beyond academics.....

Someone has rightly said, "When you dance, forget there is an audience and forget there is a podium and just dance like you never did before!". When you do this, you will automatically feel an aura of high energy engulfing you, which in turn boosts your confidence levels.

If you are in school or in college, or even in a job, ensure that you participate in all activities, which can include dance, music, painting, debating etc.., no matter how much poorly you perform and believe me, there will be some activity which will make you discover your passion and tempt you to chase it!

 Activity

Enrol yourself in singing or dance competitions, or may be if you like painting, you may attempt one. Trust me, you will have a reason to be happy and proud, which at one time may not have been a part of your emotions. This is one of the best means of how to boost self-esteem.

 

Speech is your birth right! Use it!

I would say, of all the senses, speech is one aspect which portrays the real you in the crowd! Many times, failing to speak, to ask what one feels like, becomes a root reason for a low self-esteem, which further churns the feeling of fear and shame.

Well, there is absolutely no harm in speaking your mind out! For instance, you are attending a lecture and you do not understand a point, the best thing for you to do is, to get up, shoot your query and get your answer. It does not matter, if people giggle at your ignorance but what matters is, you get what you want and may be a few more people like you get the piece of knowledge they may have been missed otherwise.

Activity

Participate in debate competitions and extempore. The first time will be gruelling to face a crowd and talk to them. But trust me; this is one of the most effective ways on how to raise your self-esteem and confidence.

 Melt in the crowd.....

Socializing is the best way for improving self-esteem. Meeting new people will help you broaden your perception about people. Let's say, it will help an ignorant frog in a well to take a big leap into the ocean! Attending technical workshops and personality building programs are some of the best ways to be a part of the crowd, you never knew!

 Activity

Try compering! This may not be everyone's cup of tea, but there is no harm in trying it either! When you host a show, you get to see the maximum number of people in different moods and it gives a feeling 'on the top of the world', when you come to realize that you can actually control the atmosphere of the crowd you are facing.

 
Say to you 'I am the best'

Last but not the least, love thyself! A beautiful life, a strong body and a mind to keep both in sync, is a gift from nature. Value it! As soon as you get up in the morning, the first person you meet is you! Smile at your mirror image and the other look alike smiles back at you! Speak out 'Rise and shine! Today, it is a beautiful day!'. This is one of the best daily affirmations for self-esteem. It is said, positive thinking is like a booster for self-esteem. Practice this self-motivation technique every day and your self-esteem will grow in leaps and bounds!

 Activity

Pamper yourself! Eat healthy food, drink a lot of water and wear clean clothes. Help the needy and at least make three people laugh a day! Not only will you love yourself more, your enhanced self-esteem will help you look at the brighter side of life, of course with its shades of grey!

 

Test Your Self Esteem

 

Now here is a small self-esteem test for you! You do not have to give me answers, but try to assess yourself with the answers you decide and you will come to know whether you need to work or not on your self-esteem level.

•Do you always procrastinate?

•Do you feel ashamed of who you are and what you are?

•Are you always afraid of what the world thinks of you?

•Do you blame yourself for all the Pandora boxes that come unwarmed?

•Do you think, the whole world has some personal vendetta against you?

•Are you quite dependent on people to dictate your tasks and schedule?

•Are you afraid to speak the right thing at the right time?

•Do you think you are not very attractive?

•Do you predict that, something that is in store for you is never going to be good?

•Do you love yourself?

These answers will help you understand whether or not you have passed this self-esteem test! Building self-esteem in children is very important, and must be done right from a tender age. Schools and colleges must make every child participate in maximum extracurricular activities to help them explore their hidden talents.

Workplaces should have a lot of team building activities for their employees to help them overcome their unknown fears. I hope, this article has helped you evaluate your self-esteem levels, if not great, but a little bit!

 
The term 'self-esteem' is defined in many ways, and as we summarize the definitions, it can be said that, self-esteem is nothing but the way you think about yourself. Higher the degree of belief in yourself, higher is the self-esteem. Often, the word self-confidence is confused with self-esteem.

According to Nathaniel Brandon, a psychotherapist and well-known writer from Canada, self-esteem is defined as the experience of being competent to cope with the basic challenges of life and being worthy of happiness.

 

Building Self Esteem

It is not that difficult to build self-esteem. All it takes is conditioning of the mind. After all, our mind plays an important role in self-development. Of course, there are external factors which affect our lives, but a healthy mind is able to build up self-esteem much faster. Listening to your heart is important. The crux of the idea of 'listening to your heart', is to do what you really want to do. It helps you realize your desires and goals in life. Trying to please everyone around, proves to be a barrier in your quest to build self-esteem.

 
Get rid of the hustle and bustle of life and spend some time in silence every day. It helps you settle down and develop your inner strength. Come out of the negative thoughts as they only make you weak. Don't be too critical about your actions. Constantly challenging yourself is one way of enhancing self-esteem. It helps break the mental barriers which we create around ourselves, knowingly or unknowingly.

Self Esteem part 3

In Summary

If you feel you suffer from low self-esteem, or you would like to help someone

•Don’t try to argue yourself; better try to be honest about your successes and failures, celebrating the former and learning from the latter.

•Look for support, from someone you can trust, or a counsellor if there is no one in your life and be honest about how it makes you feel and what you need as support.

•Try to find a sense of purpose, however small and start to work towards it by setting yourself measurable goals.

•It is also important to look after yourself while you are feeling like this. So try to eat healthily and look after yourself physically.

Others have recovered from this before you and you can too, I wish you the best of luck in your journey.

 

Self-esteem can be defined as the worth a person places upon himself. It is the value a person attaches to himself. Sometimes, the same person may have high self-esteem in certain areas of his life, while a low self-esteem in others. For instance, a successful corporate executive, who has reached the peaks of his career within a few years’ time, may have high self-esteem, as far as his work is concerned. However, if he has a series of failed relationships behind him, he can have low self-esteem in his personal life. In the latter scenario, he might consider himself a failure in building and maintaining relationships.

 

There have been many studies done in the past, which have linked self-esteem to depression. The conclusions of some have been that it is low self-esteem which leads to depression, a condition characterized by feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness and despondency. Both these conditions are related in the sense that they develop almost identical thinking patterns in the people suffering from them. Also, it is often seen that people who are less extroverted, conscientious and agreeable and who are more neurotic, are much more likely to develop these two conditions. The following article further throws light on both these conditions. Have a look...

 

Low Self Esteem and Depression - Symptoms

 

Let's start with knowing the physical and emotional symptoms of low self-esteem. Here is a list of some of the prominent ones:

•Lack of confidence

•Depression

•Social withdrawal

•Negative thinking

•Pessimistic view of the future

•Treating oneself badly, such as by indulging in overeating or remaining in abusive relationships

•Lack of social skills

•Inability to maintain relationships

•Hypersensitivity and frequently changing emotions

•Reduced social conformity

•Lack of trust on oneself

•Low expectations from people and life in general

Next, we move on to look at the signs and symptoms of depression.

•Feeling low and sad all the time

•Crying for no reason

•Having no hope for the future

•Feeling tired, mentally as well as physically

•Lack of concentration

•Lack of sleep, restless and bad dreams

•Overeating or under eating

•Suicidal thoughts

•Lack of interest in activities, things and people

•Low self-esteem

•Procrastination

•Avoiding feelings

 

Low Self Esteem and Depression - Treatment

 

Depression is a medical condition, which almost always requires medication and counselling. Self-esteem on the other hand, can be raised, with a few self-measures on the part of the person. As depression is a symptom of low self-esteem, some of these measures, may actually contribute to treating depression as well.

 

Regular Exercise

Exercising every day, for about half an hour, not only improves upon the physical health, but mentally relaxes and rejuvenates a person too. Researches have shown that exercising releases endorphins into the blood stream, which act as mood enhancers, thus relieving a person of stress and depression.

 

Socialization

People with low self-esteem often are introverted and socialize less. So, by making an effort to open up, by socializing with old friends and making a few new ones, and by trying to maintain and build upon relationships, a person can break many self-created barriers. All these measures can contribute immensely to building one's self esteem.

 

Positive Affirmations

By making positive affirmations to oneself, such as "I am successful", "I am respected", "I look good", a person can beat the negative thoughts that cross his mind. Replacing negativity with positivity and pessimism with optimism, a person can overcome low self-esteem issues to a large extent.

 

Besides these, there are a number of things that a person can do to improve self-esteem and beat depression, such as, caring for oneself, taking a healthy, balanced diet, getting involved in some interesting hobbies and activities, being organized and completing the job at hand as early as possible without any procrastination. Improving one's surroundings by redecorating one's house, dressing up well, learning something new and rewarding oneself for every small and big achievement in life, go a long way in improving one's self esteem.

 

There is no doubt about the fact that low self-esteem and depression are related in many aspects. People with low self-esteem harbours negative thoughts, such as, they are not good enough, they are not likable and that bad things are going to happen to them. It is the accumulation of these very negative thoughts which ultimately leads to anxiety and depression. And as mentioned earlier, depression is a medical condition, which can only be treated through therapy, counselling and medication. So, as soon as its symptoms become apparent, a doctor should be contacted.

 

Does low self-esteem affect love and relationships? Yes it does! Can low self-esteem prove to be a major cause for the end of a relationship? Yes, it can! Do you agree with the two statements made above? If yes, then well and well. If no, then you need to be introduced to the harrowing effects and the amount of strain that low self-esteem can render to a relationship. The most prominent signs of low self-esteem include self-denigration, anger, dwelling on past events, and other forms of behaviour which portray them as trying too hard to impress everyone around them and then losing confidence because they feel that they can never match up to the expectations. In this article, we'll go through some of the most troubling effects that low self-esteem can have on relationships.

 

Negative Attraction

Call it co-incidence, an unconscious rebellion against the law of attraction or a tricky play of fate, but people with a low self-esteem tend to get attracted to similar people with low self-esteem. Since they already have a very low sense of self-worth, when they find someone that echoes their own thoughts, they take it as a sign and go forward with what can only be a disastrous result. It's true that they may get along like a house on fire and know and understand each other perfectly well, but how healthy is it to be in a relationship with someone who thinks he is not worthy of his own or another's love? And the worst part is they don't even realize that they are in a self-deprecating relationship, because both of them have the same self-belittling outlook towards life.

 

Constant Reassurance

In the case that a person with a low self-esteem is in a relationship with someone who has a high self-esteem, the weaker person automatically assumes the role of a victim and a person who doesn't deserve any good that is coming his way. This feeling leads to the stronger person in the relationship to assume the role of the caretaker and the protector. While this may be the case even in a normal relationship, the peculiar factor is that with a person who thinks little of himself, it becomes the responsibility of the stronger person to constantly keep reassuring the person that he is not as small as he presumes himself to be and that he is much more than that. A stronger person, because of his high level of self-esteem may find it to be a boost to their ego, but soon, it can progress to the next point mentioned below.

 

Frustration

When a relationship reaches its mature stages, which are after about 2 years of being with the same person, the two people in it begin to understand each other properly. The strong person knows that his or her partner is weak and hence fuels his need for attention and support all the time. However, when he sees that nothing that he does is able to help his partner and that his partner is still the same depressed and self-sabotaging person, who refuses to have a bright perspective towards life, there is bound to be a level of frustration building up in him. The methods that he may resort to, to vent out this frustration can turn out be rather disastrous, not to mention detrimental to the essence of their relationship. After all, it makes him feel like he has been inadequate in providing what his partner needed and this can take a toll on his own self-esteem, leading him to take some unwarranted steps and bring doom to the relationship.

 

Taken for Granted

A healthy relationship can survive only when there is a balance between what is given and what is taken from the relationship. When one person in the relationship has a low self-esteem and thinks that it his duty, responsibility and his sole purpose to only keep giving and giving to the other person, he begins to be taken for granted. The stronger person may see that taking from his partner seems to give him or her a sense of purpose and thinking that this makes him or her feel better, he may begin taking the partner for granted. Both of them may feel that they are right on their part, but what they fail to see is that though they're both unconsciously getting what they want to believe is better for the other, they are only further cementing the insecurity and paranoia that the weaker person feels about himself.

 

There are many other ways in which low self-esteem affects relationships, but none of them are positive. Nothing good can come of a person thinking that he or she is not worthy to live or love. So, if you recognize these signs in your partner, help him or her to improve their self-esteem and see life through bright and sparkling lenses!

 

 

It's all in the mind, they say. What we think, so we are. They could not be more apt. Our subconscious mind is so strong, that the way one thinks, the mind starts believing and following exactly that. In that way, the image that we have of our selves, also called self-esteem, is based on what we 'think' of ourselves and the perception we have of our own self. This fact is highlighted with a study of the different kinds of people around you. Some are extremely confident of themselves, proud even. Any achievement, no matter how small or insignificant in the large scheme of things, takes on the form of something that needs to be highlighted, because they have a positive self-image. And then there are those who seem to be doing well in life, but it never translates into confidence or pride because even the slightest criticism gets them down. These classic are cases of low self-esteem.

 

Low self-esteem is a crippling condition because more than anything else, it prevents growth. One is constantly left doubting, questioning, cross-questioning, over thinking, over analysing, blaming and putting oneself down. How then, is one supposed to have a positive and healthy environment to grow in? In these cases, their own mind curbs their success. Reiterating the fact that it's all in the mind.

 

Yet, though it is a condition that is made even more intense because of the way in which we think, there are certain low self-esteem causes that lead to this condition in the first place. In most cases, the development of low self-esteem is traced back to childhood and the lack of encouragement or the constant criticism that is meted out to the child. The effects of low self-esteem which may develop in childhood can subsequently make their way into adulthood and lead to severe adjustment problems. Given the kind of crippling effect that this condition can have on the mind, it becomes extremely important to diagnose low self-esteem in a person early on so that it can be treated.

 

One of the most effective ways of diagnosing this is with the help of a low self-esteem test which can be administered for answers. In the following sections, we will take you through the details of this condition and give you a test for the same.

 

Low Self Esteem Test - Diagnosing the Problem

 

The test given below will highlight the varied low self-esteem symptoms and help diagnose this condition better.

 

 ■ I cannot hear criticism about myself. No matter whether it is constructive criticism or otherwise.

 

» Yes

» No

 

■ I am my worst critic and find it difficult to be accepting of myself and others.

 

» Yes

» No

 

■ I get very defensive when I feel that someone is criticizing me.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I cannot trust people easily.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ If someone mistreats me, I perceive it as a punishment for something bad that I've done and convince myself that I deserve it.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I often minimize my success and magnify my mistakes.

 

» Yes

» No

 

■ I tend to get very anxious in social situations and around elements that I don't know about.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I fear that people are always criticizing me.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I find myself thinking negatively most of the times.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I have given up on several dreams and ambitions because of the fear of failure and subsequently of what people would think.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I often wear branded clothes, or buy things that I feel people will like. I do not like to carry off things that I'm comfortable in which might not necessarily fall in the 'acceptable' bracket in society.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I procrastinate most of times, fretting that I might not do a good job of it.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I'm either very closed as a person or very open when it comes to sharing personal information.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I often felt inadequate and inferior as a child.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I hate getting into and therefore avoid confrontation and conflict as far as possible.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I constantly compare myself to others and feel that I have been dealt a hard hand in life.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ My decisions often change depending on what people might want to hear or expect of me.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I tend to be quiet in a social group, refraining from saying much because of the fear that others might judge me.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I am easily discouraged and am often hurt and angry by what others say and do.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 ■ I tend to be a perfectionist and want everything to be done in a particular way and style so that no one can criticize things about me.

 

» Yes

» No

 

 

 

Key - If you answered more than 4 questions positively, then it could mean that you're suffering from low self-esteem. Anything more than 10 points means that you have a very low self-image and esteem and that there is a need to take immediate action in improving your self-esteem.

 

A read through this test will have given you an idea of how a person with low self-esteem thinks and the kind of symptoms that he exhibits. After answering this low self-esteem test, if you find that you are suffering from the same, you can then take certain positive steps for overcoming low self-esteem and free yourself of the unnecessary torment and torture, in turn learning to love yourself for what you are.

 

Self-esteem is a person's perception of her/himself. If you are someone who believes you are the best thing that has happened to the planet (a thought process that is perhaps a little exaggerated and very rare), you display high self-esteem. On the other hand, if you believe that everyone out there has a poor opinion of you, or if you believe that two people are only talking about you when you see them whispering, you display low self-esteem. There are lots of causes of low self-esteem, and most of them have been traced to problems in childhood. Lack of attention from parents, unrealistic demands set by parents for children (that were never appropriately met or rewarded), or being bullied by other kids in school are examples of such causes that lead to low self-esteem in children and if left unnoticed, can run into adulthood. If efforts are not made towards improving self-esteem, it can result in serious trouble when the child grows up and affect him socially, personally, and professionally. There are several ways in which self-esteem can be improved, and if you are an adult who has grown up with self-esteem issues, here are ways in which you can overcome these.

Self Esteem Part 2

Love Yourself



"It's important to feel good ( ( ( (((good))) ) ) ) ~ The Secret (Law of Attraction) Quotes



Feel good about yourself and the things that are around you. Feel and experience the beauty and the goodness within you. Let go of all the negative insecurities and doubts. Think and belief that you are worth everything you wish to have! :)



If you follow the above rules, you will be surprised how the universe will correspond to your thoughts! You can also go through the 7 laws of attraction to know more on how it works! You don't need to think about anything! "You can begin feeling whatever you want (even if it's not there)… the universe will correspond to the nature of your song." ~ The Secret (Law of Attraction) Quotes. So make sure that you strictly follow the above mentioned law of attraction and relationships tips! These are sure to work, because, "The universe likes SPEED. Don't delay, don't second-guess, don't doubt…" You are the creator of your own world…start by ACTING NOW!



You must have heard about the law of attraction. The 7 laws of attraction inspire one to achieve all one's dreams and become successful in life. The law of attraction is a concept that has gained popularity because of a book and a movie, both with the same name, 'The Secret'. The law of attraction quotes follow a basic idea, that is, similar things are attracted to one another. All one needs to do is change the way they think and start applying the secret law of attraction quotes in their life. You can find some of the best law of attraction quotes in the following paragraphs.



The Secret Law of Attraction Quotes



We all work with one infinite power.



Those who speak most of illness have illness, those who speak most of prosperity have it..etc..



You can begin feeling whatever you want (even if it's not there). The universe will correspond to the nature of your song.



We are like magnets - like attract like. You become AND attract what you think.



You can't have a universe without the mind entering into it.



What you focus on with your thought and feeling is what you attract into your experience.



Life can and should be phenomenal.. and it will be when you consciously apply the Law of Attraction.



Size is nothing to the universe (unlimited abundance if that's what you wish) We make the rules on size and time.



The How’s are the domain of the universe. It always knows the quickest, fastest, most harmonious way between you and your dream.



No rules according to the universe. You provide the feelings of having it now and the universe will respond.



Law of Attraction Inspirational Quotes



Love is the greatest law that rules this mighty and heavenly cycle, the unique power that bindeth together the diverse elements of this material world, the supreme magnetic force that directeth the movements of the spheres in the celestial realms. ~ Abdu'l-baha



Whatever your mind can conceive and can believe, it can achieve. ~ Joseph Campbell



What you resist persists. ~ Robert Collier



All power is from within and is therefore under our control. ~ Max Planck



Action that is inspired from aligned thought is joyful action. Action that is offered from a place of contradicted thought is hard work that is not satisfying and does not yield good results. When you really feel like jumping into action, that is a clear sign that your vibration is pure and you are not offering contradicting thoughts to your own desire. When you are having a hard time making yourself do something, or when the action you offer does not produce the results you are seeking, it is always because you are offering thoughts in opposition to your desire. ~ Esther Hicks



It's not your work to make anything happen. It's your work to dream it and let it happen. Law of Attraction will make it happen. In your joy, you create something, and then you maintain your vibrational harmony with it, and the Universe must find a way to bring it about. That's the promise of Law of Attraction. ~ Abraham Hicks



The Journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. ~ LaoTzu



Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. ~ Calvin Coolidge



When you have an inspired thought, you must trust it and act on it.



You create your life through the inner power of your being, whose source is within you and yet beyond the selves that you know. Use those creative abilities with understanding abandon. Honour yourselves and move through the godliness of your being. ~ Jane Roberts



These were some quotes about the law of attraction that inspires positive thinking. The law of attraction quotes are motivational, inspirational and help one achieve their goals in life. You too can go through 'The Secret' book as well as movie and learn the secret about the power of positive thinking. Hope the law of attraction quotes covered in the above paragraphs help you reinforce positive energy in and around you.



While it's a fact that a good portion of the population is attune to visual stimuli and the intricate nuances of everyday life, many may not realize that this trait easily carries over into the dating world. As humans, we are often drawn to meet people that are like ourselves; whether it be in socio-economic status, political views, profession or hobbies.



However, if you are someone that is drawn to the simple pleasures of life, such as a bug crawling on a leaf and the shapes the clouds are forming on a blue sky day, you may be unaware that you are already subscribing to the laws of attraction.



For those that appreciate beauty and aesthetics, the laws of attraction to meet people are best translated into seeking out those of great beauty and the most attractive of women. For those who value intelligent conversation and intellectual stimuli, those singles will undeniably be drawn to those of similar intellectual depth and breadth.



To meet people the laws of attraction vary with each individual and of course can also change over time as each person continues to personally grow and expand their own interests. Because of this, some may consider the term "laws of attraction" an oxymoron, whereas there is no set law; we are all drawn to dating different types of people for different reasons.



It should be noted that to meet people by means of the law of attraction does not suggest that there will be chemistry between these individuals beyond dating. It merely indicates that there is a reasonable basis to begin exploring further possibilities. It is the laws of attraction that initially draw us to another person, but it is chemistry that will form a lasting connection. Without chemistry, you are merely admiring the beauty or attributes of another.



While finding a possible companion attractive is important, and may be what originally caught your eye, there is so much more to be considered when building a long lasting relationship or just dating. So when meeting people or someone new, whether there may be romantic intentions or just a new friend, keep your eyes open to not only what is on the outside, but the substance behind the beauty.



I’m amazed at how quickly I’ve been able to master this. Just as quick as I, you’ll be able to master it, too.



The trend lately has been to think positive, practice the Law of Attraction, and then, good things will come, as if by magic. However, for many of you, you find it is not that simple. And then, when the things you want don’t manifest, you get frustrated. You wonder what you are doing wrong.



The law of attraction is not just thinking good thoughts. If it really were that simple, you’d be able to easily manifest the things you want in your life. Even more important than your thoughts are your feelings. Your feelings are the true indicator of your alignment with the energy around you.



If you are feeling depressed, angry, resentful, or any other negative emotion, you are not in alignment with the positive energy that will bring you what you really want. It doesn’t matter how positive you think. If you aren’t feeling happy, excited, joyful, or any other positive emotion, you won’t attract anything except more of the same. You have to align your feelings with your thoughts. They both must be positive, no exceptions.



I’ve learned that you need to change your feelings and keep them flowing in a positive direction, before you think your positive thoughts. Here are the simple steps you can take to change your feelings.



First, ask yourself, at the exact moment you first feel it, why you are feeling the negative emotion. This is important because it will allow you to more quickly intercept your negative feeling so that you can replace it with a positive one. The sooner this is done, the sooner you can turn around your situation. The longer the negative emotions linger, the more you’ll experience negative events.



Typically, a thought or something you hear will trigger a negative feeling inside of you. As soon as you feel that emotion, the next step, after determining its cause, is to change your feelings about the subject in a way that pleases you. This will prove to be hard for some of you because you’ve been focusing mostly on what you don’t want. It can take practice before you are able to easily find something good to think about anything.



Here is an example. You are fired from your job and have to find a new one. In the meantime, you can collect unemployment benefits. You might normally think things like, "I can’t believe my boss would just fire me like that, after all that I’ve sacrificed for the company. I worked my butt off and this is how they repay me! What a - (insert vulgar language here)!"



Instead, you can think of it in more positive light. The more positive things you think (and say) about your seemingly negative situation, the better you will start to feel. "I’m grateful to have had the opportunity to work for them for as long as I did. It allowed me to gain some great experience that will look good on my resume. I’ve really been thinking about changing to a career that is more in line with my values, so this is the perfect time for me to choose a job that I will really love."



The third step is to allow yourself to feel the positive emotions that your positive thoughts will bring. Feel your body decompress as it eases tension you were previously holding. Then, every time you think about your situation, repeat in your mind any or all of the positive thoughts you had previously.



Consistency is the key, and the fourth step. You can’t just think positive about it on one occasion and then, the next time the topic comes up, go back to negative thoughts. In other words, it has to be a permanent mind shift on the topic. Additionally, you’ll need to practice speaking positively about the topic as well. Think before you speak and be sure the words you are going to say will reflect and make you feel positive.



Remember, your feelings are the most important thing here. You have to allow yourself to release whatever negative emotion you’ve attached to certain areas of your life, and replace them with good feelings. With practice, and time, you’ll be able to easily master this thought shift process. One day, you’ll find it has become a habit and you will rarely have to actively watch every thought or word that comes to mind.



Recap: First, identify why and what is causing you to feel how you feel. Second, shift your thoughts to more positive ones. Third, allow yourself to feel the positive emotions that will naturally embrace you once you’ve replaced bad thoughts with good ones. And finally, consistently feel those same positive feelings about the topic.

Low self-esteem seems to affect much of the population. Often it is to be found with its cousin low self-worth. Low self-esteem can be defined as having a low opinion of oneself, either consciously or unconsciously. Suffers will often have feelings of worthlessness and that they get the poor quality of life that they deserve. In addition to the emotional symptoms suffers will often exhibit physical symptoms, being socially withdrawn, or often averting their gaze from the person they are talking to.



People with low self-esteem often report low motivation, and not having any energy, perhaps feeling depressed even suicidal. Relationships can be difficult especially if the relationship is an abusive one, because the sufferer can feel that they deserve nothing better.



It is not uncommon when we have low self-esteem to judge ourselves (unfairly) by what we perceive to be others standards. I didn’t go to church so people will think I am a bad Christian. I put on two pounds last week; everyone can see me for the pig that I am. In reality these ‘others’ have not given it a second thought or indeed might be worried because you were always at church. But to our poor self-esteem it can only be because others see through the facade to the terrible person we truly are, even though there is no basis for this to be true.



Can Anything Be Done?

You can’t argue self-esteem higher, indeed people with low self-esteem are often some of the population surest about their worth (low). It is better to be honest and notice both the good and the bad. It is important to hear both the good and the bad things going on. Also you should challenge those assumptions you make about what other people are thinking - how do you know what they are thinking?



Often with low self-esteem there is a tendency to take less care of yourself - perhaps eating too much or too little, perhaps looking after your body (shaving, brushing teeth, washing hair and so forth). It is worth trying to do some of these, they improve your health and they make you more attractive to others.



It can be difficult to achieve things, we always feel that we will fail, but by carefully selecting things that we want to do and breaking it down into small steps we can see some success. Take Marjory, she was so shy she could not even face going out in the street. So her first goal was just to think about being in the street, then as those feelings began to be less frightening, she looked out the window, then next went to her door, then stood outside for a minute. Each time she was challenging herself to go a little further. With her counsellor’s help Marjory is now able to go out and while still a little uncomfortable in big crowds, has shrugged off her prison and feels better about herself for defeating the fear.



Perhaps you have an interest, perhaps even a long dormant one, could you revive it even for a short time to give sense of purpose to your life. As well as a welcome diversion, it provides a handy topic for conversation, when you don’t know what to say.



Often it is helpful to have someone we can trust on who will be honest with us as we try to value ourselves more. Counselling in Glasgow, I know that a lot of clients find help from all sorts of places, partners, family, friends and many feel that a counsellor (as an independent witness) is the way to go.

Self Esteem part 1

How to Improve Low Self Esteem

 

Learning how to gain self-esteem requires a conscious effort towards changing your thought process. It requires you to constantly remind yourself not to think negatively about yourself, and learn to appreciate who you are. It is only when you make a conscious effort that it will become a habit, and you will reach a point where nothing will really trouble you or affect your self-esteem. Here are some tips that can help you learn how to love yourself.

1.Don't spend time with people who make you feel badly about yourself; spend time with people who love who they are. This will help you develop some positive self-esteem and teach you to love the person you are.

2.Read books that provide you with methods of improving low self-esteem. As much as they are looked down upon by people (who secretly read them), these books help you gain some perspective and give you hope towards becoming the person you want to be, and faith in the person you are.

3.Learn to understand what you can expect from people around you and what is unrealistic. A true friend may be someone who is available at 2 A.M. for your distress call, but it may not always be possible for her/him to be there. This does not mean she/he doesn't care for you. If you expect someone to understand you, attempt to understand them first. Having said that, avoid keeping unrealistic expectations from you too. Give yourself credit for your worth rather than trying hard to be someone you want to in a short span of time.

4.An important step towards overcoming low self-esteem is to overcome the fear of making mistakes. You are as human as anyone else; and unless you don't go out there, try something, and make mistakes, you are never going to be able to move ahead and fulfil your dreams. Avoid trying to worry about what someone will say if you fail at something, and give yourself a pat on the back for trying.

5.Self-esteem issues also arise from one's physical appearance. It is always easy to say 'love your body', but it is definitely difficult to do it. First find out what it is that you don't like about your appearance. Is it something that can be changed, such as your hair, your body shape, or the way you dress? If you find it difficult to accept your body as it is, make an attempt to change it to what you want it to be. There is a solution for practically every physical problem on this planet, and if you want to look as charming as the people around you, take measures to do so. If that is what will improve your perception about yourself, so be it. If there is something you can't change about yourself, try to view it in a positive light and accept it. At the end of it all improving low self-esteem is all about accepting yourself the way you are.

6.Practice some daily affirmations for self-esteem. These change the way you feel about yourself. However, don't just chant them mindlessly. Believe in them and in the fact that they are changing your thoughts to help you view yourself in a positive light.

7.Those who have a low self-esteem often remain quiet and do not express their opinions for the fear of appearing silly. However, opinions are never wrong or right. Yes there can be a difference of opinion and that's where it ends. If someone is unable to respect and understand your opinion, it is that person's problem, not yours. Again, it takes time to get to a point where you cannot mind what someone thinks of you. But it is possible, and only with conscious effort.

8.Finally, enjoy yourself to the fullest. It is only your thought process that is the barrier that does not allow you to enjoy yourself and have fun. Instead of thinking that you will find a date when you start dressing differently, just go out there, be yourself, and have a great time. People love those who can enjoy themselves and are confident about themselves. It shows when you are.

Improving low self-esteem is extremely important because how you perceive yourself affects the overall quality of your live. Your relationships, personal, professional, and social are all defined by your perception of yourself followed by your perception of others. As such, you can live a full and complete life just by learning how to boost self-esteem. Remember, you are a unique person and you deserve every bit of happiness in this world. Do not undermine yourself, your talent, the people in your life, or the place you hold in their lives. Just believing in this thought will help you through half the battle. For the rest, follow the tips mentioned above and you are good to go.

 

Inferiority complex is also termed as low self-esteem. Many of us had this feeling of dissatisfaction in our childhood when our parents compared us with our siblings and favoured them indiscriminately. You may have experienced the same feeling soon after a break up. We come across such a situation in certain phases of life and move out of it after some time. However, some people may suffer from it throughout their lives. The worst part is that it can make life miserable and one stops enjoying life.

 

Inferiority Complex Definition

Inferiority is a psychological condition when a person starts feeling that he or she is inferior to others. In other words, they believe that they are not as good as their peers in terms of merits and skills. Some people are conscious about it, while others are not. The theoretical explanation of inferiority complex was first given by Alfred Adler in 1920s. According to him, the sense of inferiority is more prominent during childhood when the child is emotionally dependent on others. As they grow up into adults, most of them outgrow it but those who cannot, develop an inferiority complex.

 

What Causes Inferiority Complex?

The sense of inadequacy mostly arises when there is an emotional conflict between the desire of recognition and a fear of humiliation. People who have faced social discrimination due to their economic status, skin colour, religion, etc. are at a higher risk of suffering from this problem. Upbringing is another factor responsible for this problem. Those who were treated unequally by the parents in their formative years are prone to suffer from it. Unfortunately, in our society, those who have physically defects or mental disabilities are treated very badly. They have to struggle a lot to get recognition and get a sense of acceptance from the society. Repeated disappointments and rejections give them an inferiority complex.

 

Inferiority Complex Symptoms

In some people, the sense of inadequacy is simply imaginary and is created by their mind. In others, the problem could actually exist. Whatever be the case, recognizing the problem is very important. Some common identifiable inferiority complex symptoms are as follows.

•They yearn to get praises and recognition from other people all the time. If they do not get nice compliments, they feel sad.

•They are always busy in pointing out other people's mistakes. This happens just because they do not like themselves as a person and not confident about themselves, they find it hard to have positive feelings about others.

•They are afraid of criticism. They are fully aware of their shortcomings but if someone else point that out then they feel humiliated.

•Some people may turn aggressive and try to dominate others. They may get involved in some unhealthy competition. It is an attempt on their part to get over their psychological distress.

•Some people, on the other hand, may become extremely shy and timid. They avoid social gatherings and isolate themselves from the society.

How to Overcome Inferiority Complex

If you have inferiority complex, you create a negative self-image for yourself. You need to get rid of that in order to lead a productive life. Here are a few suggestions that will help in self-improvement.

 

Think Positively

When your approach towards life is positive, you will no longer be afraid of setbacks. Moreover, positive thinking can help you a lot to boost up your confidence and self-esteem, which in turn, help you to overcome the challenges posed in every spheres of life more efficiently.

 

Recognize your Strengths

Every individual has his or her own share of strengths and weaknesses. You should be aware of your weaknesses but do not put all your attention on them. Then you will feel that you are worthless. Rather, focus on the positives that you have. This will make you feel much better.

 

Improve Yourself

None of us are born perfect. However, we as human beings have this ability to improve ourselves and be a better human being. Figure out those areas in your life that need some changes to make your life better. It could be your career, education, personal relationships, etc. Invest some time and effort to bring about some improvement in those spheres of life. This kind of small positive changes in life helps in getting rid of inferiority complex.

 

Groom Yourself

Grooming is important for building up your personality. When you look at the mirror, if you see a shabby looking you, you are bound to feel bad about yourself. On the other hand, a smart look makes quite a positive impression. Grooming does not mean that you have to wear fashionable and expensive clothes. Rather, maintaining a good personal hygiene, wearing well-fitted clothes and keeping a good body posture makes a lot of difference. When you feel good from within, trust me the world around you seems more beautiful.

 

Stay Away from Bad Company

No matter how much you try to stay positive, you cannot succeed unless and until you have a good set of friends and acquaintances around you. You will come across a few such people who will try to make you feel inferior. These people are always depressed and are absolutely unenthusiastic about life. You should either learn to handle these people tactfully or avoid them altogether. Interact with positive people who will motivate you and provide you support as and when required.

 

Many people are not even conscious about the fact that they suffer from an inferiority complex. You are lucky that you have identified the problem and have learned how to get rid of inferiority complex. Now, the next big step is start working upon overcoming those unwanted feelings. If you feel that the problem is quite serious, then do not hesitate to consult a professional for inferiority complex help. It can be treated with the help of psychotherapy.

For the longest time, for reasons that I see clearly in retrospect, I found little in myself to be happy about. Although a happy child, adolescence brought with it a Pandora's box of insecurity issues, compounded and multiplied many times over with an unfortunate relationship that hindered far more than it helped. The teenage years, are fraught with many things, and formative as they are, play a great role in creating a perception of self-worth - these are the years during which you go through more changes than you can honestly keep track of, grapple with more emotions than normal, and that lay a foundation for the adult that you're about to become. Many times, those who make a few misinformed choices in the exuberant buoyancy of youth, me included, pay the price in lowered self-confidence, image issues, and a sense of insecurity that takes a concerted and consistent effort to overcome. Learning how to gain self-esteem is an invaluable life lesson, one that is more important than you may realize, because it's only when you love yourself, that you're able to live a happy life, well-equipped to handle the lemons that it may throw you. Listed below are some examples that will illustrate how to raise self-esteem, and the changes for the better that are bound to accompany such an effort.

 

How to Gain Self Esteem and Confidence

 

It may be hard for those who are confident, to understand the problems that someone with low confidence faces. How difficult can it be to like yourself, right? Wrong. Low confidence, doesn't build up overnight - it creeps up on you slowly and stealthily, through a series of events or people, which put you down, over and over, until, there are cracks that flourish and poke gaping holes into a hitherto strong armour. Self-belief and confidence go hand in hand, so when the belief crumbles, so does everything that depends on it - in comes the insecurity, the timidity, the uncertainty, and with it self-esteem issues that underline the lack of self-worth. Gaining self-esteem becomes all the more important as you grow up - with age, come complex relationships, professional relationships and duties that lack of confidence can seriously harm. These are some simple steps that can help you gain self-esteem back.

 

Enlist Your Good Points

We all have flaws. But in a fitting balance, and a saving grace, we've all got strong points too. For many who lack spunk, these strengths bury them within, lost to the world and hidden from everyone - but nobody knows these better than you. Strengths can be anything - it can be something you find easy, that others find hard, it could be strength of character, it could be a natural talent to sing, draw, write, create, cook, look, love or befriend. It can be your ability to be loyal; it could be tenacity, perseverance, diligence or dexterity. Figure it out, think about it, take my word for it, it exists. Isolate your strengths, write them down, preferably in notes that you can put into every pocket of every article of clothing, or somewhere where you come into contact with them every now and then, and most importantly, rejoice in them. It's you that's a marvellous friend, a fabulous cook, a dab hand at sketching; it's you who's good at something, anything. Take that back from this confidence building exercise, practice it daily and you'll find you gaining self-esteem slowly, but surely.

 

Make a Stand

Many of us who suffer from self-esteem issues can trace the cause back to troubled relationships. If you're in a relationship that makes you feel anything other than good about yourself, for any length of time, understand that this could be one of the root causes of the problem. With lack of self-confidence comes anxiety and docility, mixed with an unhealthy dose of fear - but it's very often accompanied by a partner who feeds on the insecurity instead of negating it. When your significant other has only hurtful things to say, get out before you begin to believe it. If you believe it already, get out anyway. It's hard, it's tough and even tougher if you are, like you very well may be, in a dependent relationship - you may even believe, like he/she tells you that you'll never find anybody else. But it's better to be single and content, than in a relationship and miserable - take a poll if you don't believe me. An important step in learning how to boost self-esteem is to get out of relationships that drag you under and undermine your worth.

 

Become the Source

Somebody very wise once taught me a lesson that stands me in good stead many years on, and this is important, so pay attention. You must learn to become the source of your own happiness. When you depend not on others but yourself for happiness, you become infinitely stronger, and less likely to falter. It may sound cold, it may sound lonely, but it's not - it's liberating. You need not practice it to the exclusion of all else, as long as you know the score. You need to love yourself before you can love others, selfish though it may sound. Spend time with yourself, get to know what makes you happy, what makes you sad, untempered by external sources. Listen to the music that speaks to your soul, watch the movies that make you laugh, read the books that stay with you after you've turned the last page - figure yourself out. Gaining self-confidence and esteem in the process, is just a bonus.

 

Learning how to gain self-esteem is simply put, one of the most empowering experiences that you can encounter. Trust yourself, and remember to rely on your strengths. As you emerge from the chrysalis that is a bruised and battered sense of self, take to the sky with belief, that you are unique. Learn to love, and you learn to live.

 

There are some individuals who floor you even in the first meeting. Their personality and demeanour is just so pleasant, graceful and full of poise. They ooze with a distinct positivity and self-confidence, but no vanity. There is a certain modesty and humbleness with which they behave and conduct themselves, however high pedestal they are on the financial and social ladder. Only people with healthy self-esteem can conduct themselves in such a manner. But all of us are not the same, like the fingers of our hand and thus, we do not share the same level of self-esteem. Men, women, teenagers, and individuals in all the age groups face self-esteem issues. Here is throwing light on self-esteem issues through this article below.

 

Self Esteem Issues in Teenagers

Teenage years are difficult ones for the individual going through it and even for the parents. Teenagers are not completely grown up into adults and are not kids as well. Add to it there are the mental and physical upheavals happening which leads to a lot of issues. Some children are too skinny or fat in their teens, which can lead them to think that they are too thin or otherwise and they can lose self-confidence. Low self-esteem issues crop up when teenagers are not able to cope with their studies and have not yet found what they can excel in. Impressionable as the children in this age group are and highly influenced by peer pressure, teenagers can indulge in smoking, drugs or the like. Further, there can be a dent in the self-esteem of a teenager if he or she cannot fulfil expectations from himself or herself. In some cases failing to live up to the expectations of their parents can affect the self-esteem in children.

 

Self Esteem Issues in Women

Low self-esteem issues are even more prominent in grown up women. There are some societies where women are still held to be inferior to men. In societies where female foetuses are ruthlessly killed even before the baby is born, there can be no bigger block to the self-esteem of women. There is a whole cultural baggage of a society and the woman's family which shape the self-esteem of women. Sex related crimes again are a cause of low self-esteem in women. Other self-esteem issues in women are associated with the idea of having a perfect physique. This has led to problems like anorexia and excessive dieting, starving themselves, etc. which further harms the health, thus, woman making her feel even more bad about herself. That leads to either unnecessarily high self-esteem or low self-esteem in women. Self-esteem issues then start impacting their relationships too. They feel they do not deserve their spouse because they primarily do not believe in themselves and lack self-worth. Of course all women do not fall in this category and do not show low self-esteem signs.

 

Self Esteem Issues in Men

Akin to women, men too face self-esteem issues, mainly low self-esteem. Men who have been protected all their life till they grew up and are very much confined by traditional and the conventional role are most likely to be lacking self-esteem. It then trickles in every aspect of their life. In fact, there can even be an overkill of things once they get the freedom which is detrimental to their self-esteem. Then they start avoiding developing really close relationship with anyone and all they can be is superficial. If as kids these boys have been constantly hammered about how his or her sibling is good at everything and how useless he is, it can lead to self-esteem issues in men. Sex, physicality, addiction, unrealistic expectations etc. are the main causes of low self-esteem in men as well.

 

How to Deal with Self Esteem Issues

Dealing with self-esteem and improving self-esteem is not an overnight process. Developing positive self-esteem is a continuous process. It entails a constant endeavour to improve one self and find his or her own true identity and self-worth. Here are some things which can be done to improve self-esteem.

•Loving yourself is the cardinal rule for tackling low esteem issues. Once you accept yourself as you are, you are on the course to keeping self-esteem issues at bay.

•Explore all the things possible in life with an awareness of what is good and what is also useful.

•Always think of positive things about yourself. Avoid focusing on the negative aspects.

•Taking calculated risks and being realistic can give a good boost to your self-esteem.

•Pamper yourself and take care of your body well and get to know some self-esteem affirmations as well.

•In a few cases put you first before others.

•Keep nosy, unduly critical and pompous people at bay and respect those who are genuinely interested in you

Last, but not the least, be mentally calm, meditate and relax. Hopefully, these things will help you sort out the self-esteem issues! After all, it is all in your mind and it has to come from within! No one can give you a pill for developing self-esteem!  There were situations in your life, no, in fact life is peppered by incidences where you have had to prove yourself, tell everyone what you are worth. To cut a long story short, yes life throws challenges to us which test our capabilities, our perception of our own self and self-worth. Self-esteem is what is at the root of all these things. When you are low on morale, your self-esteem is what is going to prop you up. As psychologists say, it is an enduring personality characteristic. In this article here we are going to unravel some facts about self-esteem. More specifically so, high self-esteem. If this has managed to catch your attention, then read on!

 

What is Self-Esteem?

Self-Focus

If you're interested in someone, you focus and pay attention. If you're not interested in someone, your attention wanders. So if you're sitting with the person you like, and he/she is looking at you when you're talking, that's a great sign. The eyes have it all and thus if the person is not interested he/she will keep looking out the window, or watching other girls/men.

 

Dilated eyes

As they say "The eyes are the window to the soul." Thus while you are talking to the person you like, your eye pupils dilated (get bigger) when you're excited. So if someone's eyes look really big, it shows they're interested. Thus keep your eyes on him/her and observe the eyes.

 

Lip and Mouth Activities

A girl might bite her lip gently, or run her tongue along her lip to show that she is interested. Some girls even do this deliberately to flirt, although it rarely looks natural. If you're a girl, don't try it, unless you're really sure it looks natural.

 

Hair

Fiddling and playing with hair is one way to show that you are interested. Girls wrap their fingers in their hair. Guys run their hands through their hair. Note that twirling your hair is more a sign of boredom and distraction.

 

Arms and Hands

If the girl keeps her arms or hands closed or crossed (which is normal if it’s cold) then that is a clear indication that she's not feeling comfortable. Arms that are out and away from her are less 'defensive'. Also, if the woman leaves her wrist-up, it's sort of an "I trust you" motion.

 

Legs

Women normally like to sit cross-legged and note that it doesn't mean that she isn't interested. So forget about that and concentrate on the toes because, toes tend to react to general body energy. So if someone's feeling bored and listless, they might just lay there. But if someone is feeling excited and energetic, the toe might make little circles or bounce. Women when are interested point their toes towards the man.

 

The Voice

The way someone talks and especially the tone of the voice is hugely important. It will instantly tell you whether: Are they bored and weary? Are they thoughtful and quiet? Are they enthused and interested? To find out whether the person is interested in you first watch your own speech and then watch how their speech changes.

If someone wants to 'get along' with someone else, they naturally match their speech patterns together. If you're interested in someone, you start to naturally speak like them, using the same tone of voice, the same loudness/softness and speed, the same phrases even self- esteem is defined by psychologists mostly in terms of stable sense of personal worth or worthiness.

Social learning theorists, mainly Morris Rosenberg and a few others came up with this concept. In 1969, a definition by Nathaniel Braden was accepted. It was. "The experience of being competent to cope with the basic challenges of life and being worthy of happiness". Self-worth and our own evaluation of ourselves is what primarily constitutes self-esteem.

 

High self-esteem is a type of self-esteem which psychologists have found and studied in people. People either have low self-esteem or high self-esteem. Let’s take a look at what is high self-esteem.

 

High Self Esteem Characteristics

Well, to begin with, there is no concrete high self-esteem definition. High self-esteem is observed and identified through certain behavioural patterns and personality traits. There are various things which can portray that the person has high self-esteem. These are -

•The most basic thing is that they feel worthy of love and approval. They do not need to know what they are worth from others.

•Total self-acceptance and understanding their inner self.

•Confidence in themselves and their abilities.

•Respecting and realizing individual differences among people.

•Listening to others point of view is another high self-esteem trait.

•Taking responsibility for your own actions and their consequences.

•Ability to take positive risks and effort to improve one self.

•People with high self-esteem have good communication skills.

•They never undermine the abilities of others and never demean them.

Now the tricky part here is that there is a thin line between high self-esteem and healthy self-esteem. The ones above were characteristics of healthy self-esteem. If this line between healthy and high self-esteem is crossed, it can lead to unnecessarily high self-esteem, which is not exactly an ideal scenario to be in.

What happens when a healthy self-esteem or high self-esteem (on the positive side) develops into overly high self-esteem?

 

High Self Esteem Symptoms

When individuals have a sense of higher than healthy self-esteem they display these following traits.

•They become too absorbed and content of themselves.

•They start dominating others and consider others to be inferior to them.

•Such individuals can be typically arrogant.

•Unhealthy self-love and vanity, almost to the extent of self-obsession is observed.

•They are unduly assertive.

•Humility and being humble too does not feature in their personality.

A self-report inventory can be a great way to know a person's level of self-esteem - whether it is high low or really high, even to the extent of narcissism. Signs and symptoms of low self-esteem can be immediately reflected through the related self-esteem test.

 Now talking of low self-esteem, as against adequately high self-esteem, what should be done by those who are low on self-esteem? Answer coming up on how to improve self-esteem.

 

How to have High Self Esteem

It is not an overnight event that one day you decide that you want to develop high self-esteem and abra ka dabra -! Ladies and gentlemen - here it is, high self-esteem the nest morning! Jokes apart, no you have to understand and analyse causes of low self-esteem.

Building high self-esteem is a continuous process and it almost never ends because you need to maintain your healthy self-esteem for your entire life thereafter.

There are self-esteem affirmations which will be helpful in that regard. One of the most important things to develop high self-esteem is to think positive - about everything and yourself. It is inevitable if you want to increase your sense of self-worth. For overcoming low self-esteem, understanding yourself inside out is essential. When you do not know what you really are! People, you are in a big soup. T

hen you get carried away by perception others have about you. If you know what you are for sure, what people say or think about you is inconsequential. In that regard to develop high self-esteem, be with people who really understand you and are positive all through. It is a cardinal rule for improving self-esteem. 

Feeling good about yourself involves your physical being too and not just your mental and spiritual shape. So be in as good physical condition as you can be - exercise, stay fit and in great shape. Being healthy physically, keeps you mentally strong and healthy as well, crucial for feeling good about yourself.

Doing something for others and making them happy too increases our sense of self-worth and gives us that good feeling. That is one of the good self-esteem exercises. Last and final, thing, Be yourself! Avoid trying to please everyone, especially in the matters of relationship by acting in a manner which is not YOU! That is all for now ladies and gentlemen, about high self-esteem! I hope this was helpful!

 

When you hear the term self-esteem, what do you understand by it? Most psychologists define it as term used to convey how a person appraises himself and what his self-evaluation results in. Low self-esteem is a condition that is seen in both adults and kids.

Most people tend to have a lot of insecurities that affects their confidence and the way they are perceived by other people. It is important for such people to indulge in different self-esteem games that will help build their self-worth. In this article we give you different building self-esteem activities that will help you in this task at hand.

 

Self Esteem Games for Child 

While it is difficult to imagine a kid with a low self-esteem, it is an increasing problem in children, thanks to the pressures on them to do well. Constant comparison and tough competition has led to esteem issues in several children. It is important that a kid knows how important his or her self-worth is.

 This is essential for not only his emotional development but also his intellectual and social development. Self-esteem games for girls and boys are great ways of encouraging kids to see the positives in themselves. While kids below the age of five have no problem listing out everything that they are good at, older children are often conscious of their abilities and constantly doubt their abilities.

This is the reason that it is important to indulge in different activities for building self-esteem for kids. Self-esteem games help by focusing on those qualities in kids which are positive and by increasing their awareness about their abilities. Given below are three self-esteem games for children.

 

Pick Positives

This is one of the self-esteem games that make the kid aware of how other people see them. This is a group activity. Make index cards with each card having the name of one kid. Now place all the index cards in a container of sort. Pass the container around the room.

Each child picks out one card and then makes a list of all those qualities that they like in the kid whose name they have picked out. Make it clear that there has to be no negativity of any sort. Once all the kids have made a list, let them hand it over to you. You can read out the qualities that have been mentioned by the peers of the kid. This can have quite an uplifting effect on the child and is one of the best self-esteem activities for kids.

 

Daily Diary

Another great self-esteem game that can be used to improve a child's image of oneself is to get them to maintain a daily diary. At each day's end, ask the child to list out one quality about themselves that they love.

They can do this by creating a story or making a drawing; just ensure that the process is creative in nature. Continue this practice for at least thirty days. At the end of the month ask the child to go through the diary to bring their attention to all those qualities in them that they were unaware of. This is one of those games that work best as self-esteem activities for girls.

 

Right Recipe

A tried and tested self-esteem activity that experts believe has worked wonders is this self-esteem game. In order to raise their own self-esteem, it is important that the kids are aware of what good self-esteem is. Have a discussion on self-esteem and confidence in class. Also talk about different self-esteem building activities.

Ask each child to write down what is the best recipe, according to them, for good self-esteem. Ask them to write this like they would write a recipe for a culinary delight. List out the ingredients and provide the directions. This will engage their mind and force them to think about how they can better their own self esteem. This is one of the best self-esteem games for older children and is one of the best options for self-esteem activities for teenagers.

 

Self Esteem Games for Adults

Working with kids to improve their self-esteem can be much easier than working with adults. Most adults are more set in the ways that they work and how they perceive themselves. But low self-esteem can be a frightening disease and it showcases in the form of nervousness, underdeveloped social skills, anxiety etc.

For many people it is not enough to be aware of what their self-esteem issues are. It is important for them to use different activities for self-esteem to overcome their problems. Given below are some different self-esteem games that can work wonders for adults.

 

Role Reversal

One of the best group activities to build self-esteem is a game where you take up roles in the society that are very different from whom you are in your everyday life. Each person in the group takes up a role that they have always wanted to, like that of a movie star, or a political leader, or even a teacher.

The difference lies in the fact that the rest of the group, decides by anonymous voting, which role you should be assigned. Your job would be to convince the group why you are the best person for the job. Focus on all those qualities that make you the best person for the job by focusing on your best skills. This can be one of the best self-esteem activities for adults.

 

Dream Catcher

As a kid you have a lot of dreams and ambitions. As we grow older, we tend to believe ourselves to be incapable of achieving these goals. This is one of those self-esteem games that will help you believe otherwise. Create a dream diary that is representative of all those things that you have wanted in your life.

Your goals, your dream car, your dream mansion. Let everything be a part of the dream book and then work towards converting this into reality. Look at them practically and list down the steps that will help you achieve these goals. This is also one of the best self-esteem games for teenagers.

These are just some of the self-esteem games that you can use if you have been on the lookout for activities that can help you learn how to improve self-esteem. These building self-esteem games can go a long way in improving your view of yourself and can help you become a more confident person.

 The love that one has for oneself is the purest form of love. There is a little selfishness in every kind of love that is hidden under a well-disguised illusion. And it's nothing to be ashamed of. It is quite healthy and totally justified for a person to love himself or herself, more than he claims to love another.

Like every other aspect or emotion, self-esteem too should have its limits. And while some people take it to a far reaching level of self-adulation, that they end up becoming narcissistic in nature, there are others who take it to an extreme, in the opposite direction. Low self-esteem!

The causes of low self-esteem may be many, but the effect is more or less the same. The constant bouts of self-abomination, and self-loathing, can take dangerous forms, and take the person spiralling down the emotional ladder.

Overcoming low self-esteem is totally up to the person. Whether he or she finds the emotional stamina to get over his or her low self-esteem, is a matter of personal choice. The fact that you're reading these shows that you're willing to take the initiative, and make an effort to open a new chapter in your life, or help someone who needs it. Given below are some self-esteem exercises that you can try your hand at. Follow them, and you'll notice the difference in yourself!

 

Building Self Esteem - Exercises

 It is important to recognize the signs and symptoms of low self-esteem, when they begin to manifest themselves. The issue should be tackled before it is too late, else it becomes very difficult for the person himself, and the people around him too, to cope with it.

Numerous self-esteem building activities have been proven to help people suffering from low self-esteem. Below are some building self-esteem activities which can help you rejuvenate your soul, and have a brighter perspective!

 

Self Esteem Exercises for Children

It is a depressing phenomenon to see the levels of low self-esteem in children today. The causes may be myriad, but the fact of the matter is, that kids begin to become unappreciative of them at a very young age, and this can trigger off emotions and reactions that can prove to be detrimental to their healthy emotional growth.

Building self-esteem in children is a far easier task than in their adult counterparts. Using self-esteem activities for kids is a splendid way to do so. Read the self-esteem activities for girls and boys given below, and bring about the transformation in them.

 

Tell a Story

This exercise has to be carried out in a group. Have a group of kids sit around in a circle. You have to come up with a character, and ask the kids to weave a story revolving around the character. Give them a theme, and ask them to say one sentence each, about the character that you created, highlighting positive emotions and actions.

Praise each kid when he says a line, and ask all the kids to give three claps after each sentence. This way, each kid feels important, and special.

 

Superstar Me

This is a good self-esteem activity for teenagers. You can have an entire classroom do it, or just a group of teenagers. Give each person, a paper and pen, and ask them to write their name on top, and the ten best qualities about themselves on one side of the paper.

Then, hand it over to the person sitting next to them. They must just read the name on the sheet passed to them, and write nice things about that person, on the other side of the paper. Repeat this with every kid, and finally when they get their own sheets back, they can open them and read all the wonderful things that people have said about them. They get an affirmation that they too, are good at something, and that people do appreciate them.

 

Worksheet of Feelings

Another good self-esteem exercises for girls and boys alike, is to have them maintain a worksheet. Not a worksheet about their day-to-day activities, but a worksheet of their feelings. It's quite simple, actually. Ask them to begin in the morning, and write down what they felt instantly as they woke up.

As the day progresses, have them keep a record of all the significant activities of the day, how they fared in them, and how it made them feel. At the end of the day, they must recap, and read the worksheet, and check to see what things made them happy. This will help them understand what gives them a positive energy.

 

Self Esteem Exercises for Adults

Many adults too, have low self-esteem issues. It may have been festering in them as a child and gone unnoticed by themselves or by the people around them. But once you know that you have an issue, you ought to take the necessary steps to uplift your mind, and make you feel good about yourself.

The first step towards that is to make yourself aware that ­you have a problem. Then make up your mind to get ready to face the problem. Once you've decided to face it, you have to be open to change. A change in surroundings, behaviour, perspective, reactions, etc. Given here, are some self-esteem building activities for adults. Try them out, and you'll be able to tackle the issue of low self-esteem.

 

I'm Good At

This one is a simple, yet very effective exercise, if you want to know how to boost self-esteem. What you have to do is, keep a diary. Every day, write down one thing about yourself, that you think you did well.

 It could be as simple as making a perfect omelette, or opening the lock on the door single handed. Small, silly, or seemingly mundane things. At the end of the week, or month, open the diary, and read through the pages, from the beginning. You'll see all the things that you're good at, and it will definitely boost your self-confidence!

 

Trash It

This is one of the relatively extreme self-esteem exercises for women or men. It may take a while. You need to be patient and persevering, in order for this exercise to be a success. Stand or sit in front of the mirror, for at least ten minutes every day, and take a long, hard look at yourself. Look deep inside, and try to figure out the root cause of this low level of self-esteem.

 It could be a relationship gone bad, an unfortunate incident in your childhood, dissatisfaction with your work, etc. Any reason at all. Once you've discovered what the reason is, begin the trashing! By trashing we mean it literally. Throw out anything and everything that makes all the negative feelings come back to you. Discard any clothes that you think remind you of bad things, stop going to places that you're not comfortable, etc. Simple but effectual, and it will help you to see things in a new light, by lifting a heavy weight off your shoulders!

 

Take Care

This exercise is quite the opposite, or some may say, the next step, to the exercise mentioned just above. After you get rid of anything that generates bad vibes for you, it's time to take care of yourself.

Take care, physically, and mentally. They can be absolutely anything, like going on a diet that you always wanted to, exercising regularly to tone up your body, having regular grooming visits to the salon, cultivating and pursuing hobbies, meeting new people, treating yourself to your favourite foods, showing off your talents to people you know or the new ones you meet, being impulsive and splurging once in while on something, etc.

 The bottom line is, that you should feel completely fulfilled by the end of the day, with no regrets whatsoever!

 Apart from these self-esteem exercises, you can also try these daily affirmations for self-esteem. And lastly, count off, all the blessings that you have, in the form of your family, friends, pets, your health, a roof over your head, etc. They are what will keep you ticking! And remember, as long as you are beautiful to yourself, you are beautiful to the world!

 A term used to depict a person's overall evaluation of his/her own worth is known as 'self-esteem' in Psychology. The term has a wide spectrum and covers beliefs about self, emotions like despair, pride, shame, triumph, etc. At the same time, self-esteem can also be limited to a particular aspect of a person's personality. The synonyms used for self-esteem include self-worth, self-respect, self-regard, etc.

 However, it should not be confused with self-confidence, self-efficacy, as these terms also include a streak of a person's ability and performance. If one is of the opinion, that one lacks self-esteem, then the best place is to learn from other people's life. There are a number of self-esteem quotes, which can prove to be beneficial for improving self-esteem. Let's take a look at some of these inspirational quotes for self-esteem.

 

Quotes about Self Esteem

 

Building self-esteem, rather a healthy sense of self-esteem will make a person's life happy and success filled. Many times, people fail because they lack self-esteem, hence it is important that one work on this aspect of ones personality as well. The self-esteem activities can prove to be of great help for the same. We will see the inspiring self-esteem quotes, which will prove to be of help for the same.

 

Self-esteem isn't everything; it's just that there's nothing without it. - Gloria Steinem

 

Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation. - Oscar Wilde

 

Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else. - Judy Garland

 

We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves. - François Duc de La Rochefoucauld

 

Nothing profits more than self-esteem, grounded on what is just and right. - John Milton

 

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. - E.E. Cummings

 

Almost every man wastes part of his life in attempts to display qualities which he does not possess, and to gain applause which he cannot keep. - Samuel Johnson